Amber smiled gently and hoped their little talk had eased Indigo’s mind at least a little, and that she would be able to find sleep now - not being able to sleep, even if you’re completely drained and exhausted, is the worst thing.
“Of course you’re worth forgiving Indigo” she squeezed her hand again, as if to reassure her of those words “as I said, you’re human - your conscience proves just that” she nooded and looked at the girl with kind eyes “yes, I know what you mean. What we do can be tough on the mind and soul, but believe me: you would’ve never been asked to join the league if we, the masters, never believed you had it in you to overcome it…” she exhaled and patted Indigo’s hand lightly “you’re a strong girl Indigo, you just need to give yourself a little time to process this… and-” she quickly added “some sleep!” she chuckled a little and finished her coffee.
“Come, let me follow you to your quarters” she nodded her head to the door and put the empty coffee-mug in the dishwasher. They walked silently side by side from the kitchen to Indigo’s room, the silence wasn’t uncomfortable or awkward in any way, it seemed like the moment they’d just shared had cleared any potential of it being awkward between them.
“I wondered sometimes if my conscience hadn’t been trained out of me,” Indigo mused. “Because it wasn’t useful and would keep me from taking the shot, or something. As absurd as it sounds, it’s nice to know a little piece of it is still in there. And you’re right, it’s tough, it leaves its marks on you, ones you can’t see and can’t erase. And the League only made me stronger and more capable of looking after myself, so I guess that’s good, right? I won’t be hungry and homeless again any time soon.”
“OK,” she said quietly, standing up and collecting her glass, placing it next to Amber’s mug in the dishwasher. The walk back to her own quarters gave her some time to reflect on the things Amber had said, and the more she said them to herself over and over again, the more she started to sort of believe them. It would take time, obviously, but at least she wasn’t going to believe that she was an irredeemable monster anymore.